This is an incredible time to be alive with old systems crumbling alongside new and ancient systems arising. Many of us are collectively feeling the weight of the world and looking for our place within the ever changing landscape that surrounds us. We are trying to find this footing while there are very real concerns about the survival of our species. We are collectively witnessing the devastating effects to the natural world from our modern and “civilized” culture. It can all be so overwhelming and it's so easy to become numb to it all. I sure know I have gone to places of numbness and overwhelm when traversing this modern landscape. Having children has only amplified my fears for the future of this beautiful planet and the world my descendants are inheriting from us.
I think a lot about despair. I also think about heartbreak as a tool for change. This is not a morbid obsession yet a curious one. In a society that wants to perpetuate false ideas of happiness and security, oftentimes I see myself and my peers and our children and our parents trying as hard as we all can to avoid that despair. My heart aches for the pain and suffering that I witness, not only in my community but also globally. It is so easy to numb in the face of all of it yet the very thing I need to do is be awake in it. I understand despair and heartbreak to be necessary experiences that are often bypassed in our perfectly marketed and colonized world. We are all so collectively exhausted from the charade.
Here we are at a crossroads. A cosmic crossroads of sorts. I am waiting. We are all waiting for a new world to emerge. This waiting is by no means passive, it is an heartbreakingly active way of being. In order for a new world to arise, we must first be awake to the wonders within our own hearts. It is so easy to numb in the face of all the suffering. It can all be so overwhelming at times. Our systems, our institutions, our entertainers are all so focused on both numbing us and terrifying us. How can we find hope when we are ruled by corporations, watching our children being gunned down and Mother Earth burning? I hear so much hopelessness in the people I meet yet I feel empowered, hopeful and optimistic about the future. This is by no means a blind optimism but an active one. I have worked hard for this stance. Perhaps you will too.
Have you ever wanted to join a women’s circle or group but were unsure if the group is right for you? So many of us are craving connection and community yet sometimes it can feel like a land mine finding a community that aligns with our own hearts and minds. If you are anything like me then groups can be incredibly triggering. I wanted to write something as an offering to those women who are craving connection but unsure if one of my circles is the right space for them. If my words don’t resonate with you then I encourage you to find a women’s group that you do feel aligned with as our world needs women to come together in unity at this time. Finding a culture that honors your truth and helps you feel safe is an important part of what is needed in our communities. If my words do resonate with you then I would love the opportunity to share space with you.
I’ll never forget the time I was in a coffee shop in Brooklyn, carrying my first son, Jack as a baby on my chest in an Ergo. I was getting a coffee and couldn’t figure out how to drink it without getting it on his head.
(Don’t you worry, I have since mastered this delicate and important skill).
I was dealing with sleep deprivation and really wanted that coffee but wasn’t prepared to navigate sharing my body with this little being. I was also navigating an inner dialogue of shame for needing that coffee and feared being judged by others. That fear of judgment lives deep in my bones and I have often found myself shrinking to make others comfortable. This unhealed part of me only increased once I became a mother.
